I was born into a christian family, the youngest of six siblings. Being the youngest, the family gave me a lot of love and attention but I was never satisfied. I felt emptiness within, had anxiety, low self esteem and frustrated with life. I came in contact with drugs at school. Initially I thought I found the solution to my problems, but soon realized was I in trouble.
For 15 long years I did all sorts of crazy things, like stealing, cheated, lied, peddled drugs and even sold all my belongings to support my addiction. I was also put behind bars on several occasions. My life was unmanageable and disorganized. I was filled with self hatred, self pity and confused.
Finally my brother called the HIV/AIDS help line 1097. Through this call a counselor of Kripa Foundation came and motivated me to treatment at the Kripa Rehabilitation Centre. The 12 step spiritual programme of the centre helped me. I began to feel different as I surrendered my will to the higher power (god), a new direction of life for me dawned and was able to address many of my problems. The investment of five months in the rehab centre was well worth it. Today I have happiness and peace in being drug free, rebuilt my relationship with the family and loved ones, got a job at the centre as a resident counselor for the last 5 years.
I was brought up to believe in god, but it was only through the 12 step programme that my faith in the power and reality of god was affirmed. The life I live now is “One day at a time”, my future rests in gods hand. I have a better understanding of what drug addiction is all about. The drug suppresses and dulls the ability to function right, most of all drugs destroy and kill. But my life proves that drugs “Treatment works”.
Having gone through the experience of drug abuse, my humble submission to those contemplating drug use is “Don’t!! – it’s not worth it”. My drug use dragged into the pit of shame, guilt, self pity resentment towards self, God and others. Life is meant for living free of drugs.