“Some of us first saw the effects of addiction on the people closest to us. We were very dependent on them to carry us through life. We felt angry disappointed, and hurt when they found other interests, friends, and loved ones.”

Addiction affected every area of our lives. Just as we sought the drug that would make everything alright, so we sought people to fix us. We made impossible demands, driving away those who had anything of worth to offer us. Often, the only people left were those who were themselves too needy to be capable of denying our unrealistic expectations. It’s no wonder that we were unable to establish and maintain healthy intimate relationships in our addiction.

Today, in recovery, we’ve stopped expecting drugs to fix us. If we still expect people to fix us, perhaps it’s time to extend our recovery program to our relationships. We begin by admitting we have a problem—that we don’t know the first thing about how to have healthy intimate relationships. We seek out members who’ve had similar problems and have found relief. We talk with them and listen to what they share about this aspect of their recovery. We apply the program to all our affairs, seeking the same kind of freedom in our relationships that we find throughout our recovery.

Just for today: Loving relationships are within my reach. Today, I will examine the effects of addiction on my relationships so that I can begin seeking recovery.